Improvement of Behaviour
Action Item 1: Be a great listener.
Being an effective communicator isn't simply based on how well you can talk and interpret — half of this art is listening. While most people think listening is something they can do naturally, it is often a skill that needs to be developed. The more you learn how to consider what someone else is saying, the more you will create a level of trust. Trust brings out the best between two people and builds a feeling of comfort and intimacy.
Action Item 2: Make yourself available.
You can't get a date if you're not out meeting people who are like yourself and to whom you are likely to be attracted. The more energy you can put into this the better, assuming that you don't let the search discourage you. All good things come in time, and perseverance will get you what you want. Seek out people whose attention you truly desire, and make sure you spend a fair amount of time doing it. And don't believe that there is any one magic way to attracting attention. Be open to a number of possibilities. Just be conscious that you are exerting patience, as desperation is not attractive. And besides, who says there's a time limit to finding someone?
Action Item 3: Stand up for yourself.
Don't be a doormat. When someone treats you unkindly, establish your boundaries and let that person know you won't be bullied. Also, present yourself as a united front. Stand by your guns and don't try to seem more attractive to each person you talk to by adjusting your opinions to match his. It will have the opposite effect. You have to be "you," even if it seems scary to do so sometimes. Otherwise, why would anyone trust or respect you?
Being an effective communicator isn't simply based on how well you can talk and interpret — half of this art is listening. While most people think listening is something they can do naturally, it is often a skill that needs to be developed. The more you learn how to consider what someone else is saying, the more you will create a level of trust. Trust brings out the best between two people and builds a feeling of comfort and intimacy.
Action Item 2: Make yourself available.
You can't get a date if you're not out meeting people who are like yourself and to whom you are likely to be attracted. The more energy you can put into this the better, assuming that you don't let the search discourage you. All good things come in time, and perseverance will get you what you want. Seek out people whose attention you truly desire, and make sure you spend a fair amount of time doing it. And don't believe that there is any one magic way to attracting attention. Be open to a number of possibilities. Just be conscious that you are exerting patience, as desperation is not attractive. And besides, who says there's a time limit to finding someone?
Action Item 3: Stand up for yourself.
Don't be a doormat. When someone treats you unkindly, establish your boundaries and let that person know you won't be bullied. Also, present yourself as a united front. Stand by your guns and don't try to seem more attractive to each person you talk to by adjusting your opinions to match his. It will have the opposite effect. You have to be "you," even if it seems scary to do so sometimes. Otherwise, why would anyone trust or respect you?
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