Time to Let Go
We should evaluate the value of things we currently have and determine if they still mean anything to us, says Joan Marques
It is so easy to fall into the trap of taking things seriously: Too seriously We hold on to partners, possessions, careers,and lifestyles, long after they have lost their meaning to us. This tendency to hold on may stem from a deep insecurity inmost people. The reasoning may be, in many instances, "I know what I have, but I am not sure what I'll get." And yet, howhappy do these considerations and conservatisms make us? When we make up the inner-balance, which side of the scale tips?And what do we see when we take a critical look around us? Are the ones who release their constrictions not the more relaxedones? Think of them: The colleagues who chose for a career-change instead of drag- ging themselves to an undesirable work-place everyday, while you are still stuck there: the friends who got a divorce instead of undergoing emotional abuse any longer,while you are still scraping your self-esteem off the floor everyday; the acquaintances that exchanged their expensivehome for an easy apartment in a simpler living area when times got rough, while you're still struggling to pay the bills everymonth?
Letting go, whether psychological or physiological, is an art that only develops through thorough examination of ourselves, and the society we live in. It re-quires critical thinking and the development of an own insight, independent from indoctrination. It also requires seeingthings in a perspective that starts with freeing ourselves from the burden of guilt and devotion to the status quo, which so.many of the institutions we attend teach us, and ends with releasing all factors that disturb our inner-connection, which is the connection we have with ourselves.
If we know that life is limited and that it will end sooner or later; why do we, then, cling to anything at all, especially if thereare signs that either our interest towards those things has diminished, or the interest of those things towards us? Is impris-onment, whether physical or mental, not the most humiliatingof all states? So why, then, do so many of us settle for it? The an-swer, as indicated before, probbly boils down to cultural and societal indoctrination: expectations that we feel we have tolive up to, just because we were taught to do so: Marriages should last forever because they are sacred; jobs should be cher-ished because they are so scarce; status symbols (houses, cars, expensive outfits) should be maintained because they makesuch a good impression: that's indoctrination, and we can only start enjoying life if we see through this trick, and free our-selves from it.
Once we concur on these insights, we can start our strategy towards freeing ourselves from indoctrination. How? Thereare three ways we can do that. Firstly by scrutinizing our real emotions towards everything we possess and everyone we have a relationship with.
Secondly, respecting the institutions we attend (workplaces, schools, clubs), but regularly questioning ourselves as towhether these institutions still fulfil a need within us and serve our purposes.
If not, we should reconsider the relationship. And lastly, doing at least one different thing at least once a year, dependingon the intensity complexity and costliness of our choice.
It is so easy to fall into the trap of taking things seriously: Too seriously We hold on to partners, possessions, careers,and lifestyles, long after they have lost their meaning to us. This tendency to hold on may stem from a deep insecurity inmost people. The reasoning may be, in many instances, "I know what I have, but I am not sure what I'll get." And yet, howhappy do these considerations and conservatisms make us? When we make up the inner-balance, which side of the scale tips?And what do we see when we take a critical look around us? Are the ones who release their constrictions not the more relaxedones? Think of them: The colleagues who chose for a career-change instead of drag- ging themselves to an undesirable work-place everyday, while you are still stuck there: the friends who got a divorce instead of undergoing emotional abuse any longer,while you are still scraping your self-esteem off the floor everyday; the acquaintances that exchanged their expensivehome for an easy apartment in a simpler living area when times got rough, while you're still struggling to pay the bills everymonth?
Letting go, whether psychological or physiological, is an art that only develops through thorough examination of ourselves, and the society we live in. It re-quires critical thinking and the development of an own insight, independent from indoctrination. It also requires seeingthings in a perspective that starts with freeing ourselves from the burden of guilt and devotion to the status quo, which so.many of the institutions we attend teach us, and ends with releasing all factors that disturb our inner-connection, which is the connection we have with ourselves.
If we know that life is limited and that it will end sooner or later; why do we, then, cling to anything at all, especially if thereare signs that either our interest towards those things has diminished, or the interest of those things towards us? Is impris-onment, whether physical or mental, not the most humiliatingof all states? So why, then, do so many of us settle for it? The an-swer, as indicated before, probbly boils down to cultural and societal indoctrination: expectations that we feel we have tolive up to, just because we were taught to do so: Marriages should last forever because they are sacred; jobs should be cher-ished because they are so scarce; status symbols (houses, cars, expensive outfits) should be maintained because they makesuch a good impression: that's indoctrination, and we can only start enjoying life if we see through this trick, and free our-selves from it.
Once we concur on these insights, we can start our strategy towards freeing ourselves from indoctrination. How? Thereare three ways we can do that. Firstly by scrutinizing our real emotions towards everything we possess and everyone we have a relationship with.
Secondly, respecting the institutions we attend (workplaces, schools, clubs), but regularly questioning ourselves as towhether these institutions still fulfil a need within us and serve our purposes.
If not, we should reconsider the relationship. And lastly, doing at least one different thing at least once a year, dependingon the intensity complexity and costliness of our choice.
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